Welcome; we are so sorry for your loss . . .
Please let's share:
Following the traumatic deaths of our seven children and one sister, we have marked "hope" as one of our most sustaining insights. Consistently it graciously retains its relevance and power.
When you are bereaved, the ache in your heart, and the sinking sensation in your stomach may control your world. Unwillingly, you have joined a terrible club and may feel irrevocably broken.
This stained-glass sunrise grew slowly from many broken pieces. With grief-work, and caring support your shattered pieces will realign too, into the irreplaceable person who is you; different than before your loss, how could you not be? But still you...
As difficult anniversaries unfold, sharing your story will lighten your burden, while encouraging an expansion of your essential coping circle.
Yes, grief is your hardest work:
Please keep expectations of yourself realistic. Despair and exhaustion, among other painful emotions, can be usual reactions to your loss.
Your grief is not an attitude problem to be corrected with false joviality; nonetheless, it is healthy for you to smile and laugh whenever you can. Laughter is never disrespectful to your loved one's death. Your roller-coaster-ride of loss will wear many different faces.
Permission to grab little breaks:
Walk with your grief in nature; savour a cup of tea in a comfy chair, or an update in your journal. Perhaps, a distracting program; or, an empathetic chat with a friend. While your tears continue to flow, your mind and heart benefit from each small diversion.
Continue to speak to yourself respectfully. With zero timelines for your grief-journey, you will find a way to live with your life-changing and unexpected loss. We say "unexpected," because even if your loved-one has been seriously ill, rarely are we/you prepared for his/her death. You may not realize this, but you are far braver than you know.
No one willingly chooses grief. Our goal is to help when this uninvited intruder chooses you. As celebratory times arrive, bursting with memories, it's understandable to be blind-sided by painful thoughts of: "before-your-loss," and "after-your-loss."
You have been coping with so much. When moments feel too overwhelming to bear, please reach out to wise people, wise quotes, and wise words.
Reading can offer a safe private space:
Bibliotherapy (books as therapy): Books are accessible always. Books can open-up insights as to how others cope. Explore Dr. Hoi F. Cheu's article on Bibliotherapy in the Addendum of Life Came to a Standstill.
Please explore other pages on our site; free booklets, a poem, and dragonfly key chains:
In the headings choose the option for Grief and the Courts, and A Guide For Living After Loss. You also can read Dawn's original poem, perhaps contact Barbara regarding her amazing key-chains, and/or continue for book tips.
Alone:
If friends and family cannot grasp the weight of your grief, please share how you feel. Ask for what you need. Teach those in your support circles how to help you best. Truly they cannot know (for sure) without your help.
Wide swings of emotion can be normal for you; including fear, and possibly anger. Expressing your feelings may offer a healthy release and validation for you.
Essential rules: "Do not hurt yourself. Do not hurt anyone else."
Bereavement support:
Various communities, in many countries, offer free support for grieving families. Bereaved Families of Ontario, and Compassionate Friends are examples of only two.
Wherever you live, please research the avenue most accessible and best suited to you. Your well-being is the primary focus of these volunteer based organizations. Sharing your unique story with those you trust will lighten your burden and bolster your confidence.
Every healing effort helps you:
Following the traumatic deaths of our seven children and one sister, we have marked "hope" as one of our most sustaining insights. Consistently it graciously retains its relevance and power.
When you are bereaved, the ache in your heart, and the sinking sensation in your stomach may control your world. Unwillingly, you have joined a terrible club and may feel irrevocably broken.
This stained-glass sunrise grew slowly from many broken pieces. With grief-work, and caring support your shattered pieces will realign too, into the irreplaceable person who is you; different than before your loss, how could you not be? But still you...
As difficult anniversaries unfold, sharing your story will lighten your burden, while encouraging an expansion of your essential coping circle.
Yes, grief is your hardest work:
Please keep expectations of yourself realistic. Despair and exhaustion, among other painful emotions, can be usual reactions to your loss.
Your grief is not an attitude problem to be corrected with false joviality; nonetheless, it is healthy for you to smile and laugh whenever you can. Laughter is never disrespectful to your loved one's death. Your roller-coaster-ride of loss will wear many different faces.
Permission to grab little breaks:
Walk with your grief in nature; savour a cup of tea in a comfy chair, or an update in your journal. Perhaps, a distracting program; or, an empathetic chat with a friend. While your tears continue to flow, your mind and heart benefit from each small diversion.
Continue to speak to yourself respectfully. With zero timelines for your grief-journey, you will find a way to live with your life-changing and unexpected loss. We say "unexpected," because even if your loved-one has been seriously ill, rarely are we/you prepared for his/her death. You may not realize this, but you are far braver than you know.
No one willingly chooses grief. Our goal is to help when this uninvited intruder chooses you. As celebratory times arrive, bursting with memories, it's understandable to be blind-sided by painful thoughts of: "before-your-loss," and "after-your-loss."
You have been coping with so much. When moments feel too overwhelming to bear, please reach out to wise people, wise quotes, and wise words.
Reading can offer a safe private space:
Bibliotherapy (books as therapy): Books are accessible always. Books can open-up insights as to how others cope. Explore Dr. Hoi F. Cheu's article on Bibliotherapy in the Addendum of Life Came to a Standstill.
Please explore other pages on our site; free booklets, a poem, and dragonfly key chains:
In the headings choose the option for Grief and the Courts, and A Guide For Living After Loss. You also can read Dawn's original poem, perhaps contact Barbara regarding her amazing key-chains, and/or continue for book tips.
Alone:
If friends and family cannot grasp the weight of your grief, please share how you feel. Ask for what you need. Teach those in your support circles how to help you best. Truly they cannot know (for sure) without your help.
Wide swings of emotion can be normal for you; including fear, and possibly anger. Expressing your feelings may offer a healthy release and validation for you.
Essential rules: "Do not hurt yourself. Do not hurt anyone else."
Bereavement support:
Various communities, in many countries, offer free support for grieving families. Bereaved Families of Ontario, and Compassionate Friends are examples of only two.
Wherever you live, please research the avenue most accessible and best suited to you. Your well-being is the primary focus of these volunteer based organizations. Sharing your unique story with those you trust will lighten your burden and bolster your confidence.
Every healing effort helps you:
"Give sorrow words; the grief that does not speak
Whispers the oe'r fraught heart and bids it break.
--William Shakespeare
Warmest congratulations all past Goodreads Giveaway winners. We hope to offer a new giveaway soon. Sincere thanks for your interest in "Life Came to a Standstill."
Goodreads link available here: www.goodreads.com/author/dashboard?ref=nav_profile_authordash
Goodreads link available here: www.goodreads.com/author/dashboard?ref=nav_profile_authordash
"Life Came to a Standstill,"
True Accounts of Loss, Love, and Hope How does a parent live through the death of a child? This profound poignant compilation of the courageous personal journeys of seven grieving mothers, and one grieving sister offers a road map of how to cope with the anguish of traumatic unexpected loss—giving inspiration for continuing to live. |